
“Get the fuck
out!” Matt screamed at the top of his lungs. Greg had just thrown Chris Master’s
his jacket and told him to get the fuck out if he knew what was good for him.
Masters, not knowing how much stroke Greg had in the back, took his advice and
got out. “What the fuck are you doing?” Matt continued as Greg walked over and
shut the door behind the rookie.
Greg stood there in front of the door for a while and listen to Matt scream at
him. “I’m taking back what’s mine.” Greg said, after Matt had stopped his rant.
“I lied, Matt. I did love you when we split up, and I still do. And seeing what
you’re doing to yourself is killing me.”
Matt stood there remembering the night clearly. Greg told him that it didn’t
matter who he fucked, because he never loved him anyway. He was just biding his
time till something better came along. Those words cut Matt to the bone that
night, and still did on the rare occasion he let himself be sober enough to
think about them. “Well, if you loved me so much, why did you just let me walk
out the door that night?” Matt said, readying himself for the fight of his life.
“You hurt me Matt.” Greg said, taking a few steps away from the door and toward
Matt. “You hurt me so bad, that the only thing I could think to was hurt you
back.”
Matt took a few steps backwards. “Well, guess what, Greg?” Matt said. “You did.
And guess what else? It really doesn’t matter who I fuck. They’re all better
than you.”
Those words were like a being run over by a truck. Greg had walked in to Matt’s
house thinking that he’d tell Matt how he felt and everything would be fine. He
realized right then, that this was going to take some work, and he wasn’t
budging until it did work. The love of his life was at stake. “How the hell
would you know Matt?” Greg said, letting some of the hurt and anger show in his
voice. “Were you sober enough to feel anything? Or, maybe, after you fucked The
Show you were just to stretched out to feel anything else. At least that’s what
I’ve heard.”
“Oh, excuse me!” Matt screamed. “Not all of us can be righteous as the all
mighty Greg Helms. I heard that you could have joined a monastery after we
split. That was when you weren’t teasing half the guys in the back to the point
that none of them used hot water in the showers.”
“Why would they have to take cold showers, Matt?” Greg said, advancing on Matt
again. “Weren’t you there to provide an easy fuck? At least you had my back on
something. But aren’t you afraid that all those guys were thinking of me while
they fucked you?”
Matt took a few more steps backward, his back hitting the wall behind him. “Oh,
Sugar, trust me they weren’t thinking about you. It was my name they were
screaming.” Matt said, using the special nickname he’d given Greg years ago.
When they’d first hooked up, it didn’t take Matt long to realize that Greg had
quite the sweet tooth. Chocolate syrup, caramel, whipped topping,
strawberries... And those weren’t on dessert, those were on Matt.
“Trust me Matt, they were only....” Greg's words trailed off. He knew that the
two of them could stand there and do this all night. “This is not what I came
here for.” Greg said, walking up to Matt and placing his hands on the wall, on
either side of Matt’s head.
“Sorry Greg.” Matt said, with a knowing look on his face. “You lost the right to
that years ago.”
Greg could have hit Matt then. “Dam it, Matt!” Greg said, a little louder than
he should have. “I didn’t come here to have sex with you. Not everything is
about sex. I came here to get you back.” Matt froze. Deep down, in places that
he didn’t want to discuss, he’d prayed that’s why Greg was standing in his
house. To save him. Greg took one hand off the wall and cupped Matt’s cheek.
“You’re the only person I’ve ever loved. I can’t sit back and watch what you’re
doing to yourself without putting up some kind of fight.”
“Fight? Fight huh?” Matt said, getting angrier than he had been before. “Did you
put a fight for me when I got fired? Did you fight for me when all the guys in
the back started using me as their personal sex machine? Did you fight for me
when I walked out of your house that night? It seems like the only one you want
to fight, is me.” Matt ducked under Greg’s arm and walked upstairs. “Get the
fuck out of my house. Go pull your super hero bullshit on somebody that cares.”
Greg watched as Matt walked into his bedroom and shut the door. He waited a few
minutes and then followed. When he opened the door, his suspicions were
confirmed. Matt was passed out. “You’re getting my help weather you want it or
not.” Greg said in Matt’s direction, and shut the door.
It took Greg two hours to dump out all the alcohol in the house. When he was
finished he had three trash sacks full of empty bottles. Next came the lube.
Matt seemed to have every kind there was on the market. In every flavor. Greg
kept the ones that he knew him and Matt liked, and threw the rest away. As he
was doing all of this, he started to notice all the sex implements Matt had
lying about. Handcuffs, whips, you name it, Matt probably had it.
When Greg was done with his ‘spring cleaning’ he sat down on the couch and
grabbed the TV remote. He turned it on and hit play on the DVD player, curious
about what Matt had been watching last. His heart filled with such hope that it
could have burst. Matt had been watching a DVD they’d made. It wasn’t anything
sexual, just the two of them at home, being themselves. He noticed the way they
looked at each other back then. There was such love radiating between the two
that he couldn’t imagine how Matt could’ve believed that he’d never loved him.
Greg sat up all night long, thinking about what the future might hold, finally
dozing off in the wee hours of the morning.
Greg’s alarm clock the next morning was a stinging slap to the back of his head.
“Wake the fuck up.” Matt said, sounding none to pleased with his cleaner house.
“Where the hell is it?”
“Where the hell’s what?” Greg asked, sitting up and rubbing the back of his
head.
“Where’s my vodka?” Matt said, glaring at his unwelcome house guest.
Greg knew this fight was coming, and he’d prepared for it. “I threw it out,
darlin’” Greg said, standing up preparing to be punched. “I threw it all away.
The booze, the lube, the toys, it’s all gone.”
“Don’t call me darlin’, you son of a bitch.” Matt said, walking over to the door
and grabbing his keys off the table.
“Where are you going?” Greg asked, knowing full well where Matt was headed.
Matt opened the door. “Not like I have to answer to you, but I’m going to liquor
store.” Matt said, and headed out the door.
Greg stopped him in his tracks. “I saw the DVD that you were watching.” Greg
said, watching Matt stop like he’d hit a wall. “You wanted me to come save you
didn’t you?”
Matt turned around and marched back in the house. “What the hell do you want
from me Greg?” Matt said.
“The truth, Matt.” Greg said, meeting Matt halfway across the floor. “For the
first time in years, the truth.”
Matt stood there as if contemplating telling another lie. He didn’t. “You want
the truth?” Matt said, letting the first tear fall from his eye. “The truth is I
can’t stop thinking about you. Every time one of those guys would touch me, it
would turn my stomach until I closed my eyes tight and pretended it was you. I
still hear every special thing you’ve ever said, every pet name you’ve ever
called me. They ring in my head like bells most times.” Matt paused and let the
tears fall freely for a second. “I wish to God that I could rip my heart out of
my chest and replace it with one that didn’t love you, because being with out
you is worse than death. Is that the truth you wanted Greg?” Matt began to weep
convulsively.
Greg could tell this was the real Matt. He could also tell, just by the look in
his eyes that Matt was telling the truth. He wrapped his arms around Matt, and
the two stood locked in an embrace for what seemed like hours.
When the embrace was broken, they looked into each others eyes. Both knew that
the road they were going to travel would have it’s bumps, and neither was sure
they would make it, but they were going to try. It was time to see if love
really could conquer all.