Today I turned 40. Me. Michael Shawn Hickenbottom. 40. Kevin and Scott have already seen this day, in their lives, come and go. They keep telling me it’s no big deal and that I’m making to big of a deal about it, but it really bugs me. I’ve already had to endure my career almost being taken away from me. I had to work my ass off to get that back. Only to have most of the guys in the locker room walk up to me and tell me it’s an honor to meet me, because they grew up watching me. At first I thought it was cool to be called The Legend, or The Icon. Now it’s just depressing. Why don’t they just walk up and clap me on the back and say ‘Hey old timer? I don’t think it could make me feel any worse.

Those are some of the reasons my friends got together and threw me this little party. Alright, maybe little isn’t the best way to describe it. This party would be a wrestling fans wet fucking dream. The guest list reads as a who’s who of the business. Triple H, Dave Batista, John Cena, Steve Austin, Chris Jericho, Kevin Nash... The list goes on and on. Hell even half the damn TNA roster is here, thanks to Kevin. That’s just what I needed. More youngins telling me how thrilled they are to meet a legend. I guess I should be thankful that this many people showed up to celebrate the big 4 0 with me. Well, fuck them all. This is no cause for celebration.

To make matters worse (if that were possible) my boyfriend of a year dumped my old ass, two weeks ago. I should’ve known that it wouldn’t work out. He was only a little over a decade younger than me. Yeah I said a decade. 10 years. And then some. God he was beautiful, though. Yep, beautiful, cocky, built, young, and hung. I guess you could say I have a soft spot for guys like that. They seem to blow in and out of my life like tornados through Kansas. I should have seen this breakup coming the first time we hooked up. In fact, it was my birthday last year that it happened. I had no idea that I could have that many orgasms, that were that powerful, in one night. But I did. And I let my heart fall in love with the man that caused them. Yeah, I should have known that I couldn’t keep a guy like Randall Keith Orton satisfied for very long. But hey, you can’t blame a guy for trying, right?

So here I sit, drink in hand, 40, and alone. And to tell you the truth, that’s pretty much how I’d like to keep it right now. Just sit here and drink this damn night away. Unfortunately it doesn’t look like that’s how it’s gonna go, because here comes Kevin with that, ‘Hey man I’m gonna set you up’, look in his eye. I hope he knows I’m in no mood for company tonight. I smile when he walks up and wishes me a happy birthday for about the hundredth time today. I wish everyone would quit calling it a ‘happy’ birthday. Happiness was 30. When I was still young, still loved, and still desired. Hell, the way I feel today, happiness is 39. Kevin’s been talking for a few minutes, but I’ll be damned if I know what he’s been saying. Then it all becomes clear, as he motions towards the man, that I didn’t even notice, standing in front of me.

When I finally looked up, the sight that I saw nearly took my breath. There was this man with long wavy dark brown hair, deep dark chocolate brown eyes, full lips that curved into a smile that I could practically feel the warmth emanating from, and a strong noble chin. Yeah standing right in front of me, with his crotch at my eye level, was Steven James Borden. A man so far out of my league that it would take me sprouting a third eyeball in the middle of my forehead to get him to notice me. So you could imagine my surprise when he sat down and started talking to me.

As he sat there and talked to me I was immersed in the velvety voice that was pouring out of this man. The way his lips moved while he was forming words, was more intoxicating than any alcoholic beverage that could’ve been made. The way his hands gestured, to drive home the emphasis of his articulations, were as fluid and graceful as a conductor of a classical symphony. The muscles moving under his skin, though, were the reasons I was not hearing a thing, this obviously passionate man, was saying. Those muscles had me hypnotized. I couldn’t take my eyes off this man, if I was on fire. And after a few minutes with The Man Known As Sting, that’s exactly what my body felt like. It was on fire.

I could actually feel the heat coming off this man. It was taking my breath away, and that breath was completely gone the minute I felt his strong hand on my thigh. I looked down at his hand to make sure I wasn’t just imagining things. No. I’m not imagining any of this. His hand is on my thigh, and before I knew what was happening, his finger was under my chin. Forcing me to look into those chocolate eyes. I guess I wasn’t fooling him this whole time, like I thought I was, because he just had one thing to say to me. “You haven’t heard a word I’ve said. Have You?” Before I could respond he spoke again. “I guess I’ll just have to find another way to get my point across.”

The next thing I knew his lips were on mine. Oh God. I could fall in love with this man. If he does everything as well as he kisses, I’m already in love. He’s placed his hands on either side of my head. If he’s doing it so I won’t run, he’s doing for all the wrong reasons. I could no more run from this man right now, then I could stop my own heart from beating. He pulls away from the kiss, and before I could stop myself, I let out a little whimper of disappointment. I don’t know what my eyes are telling him right now, but he’s stood up and took my hand in his to pull me up. When I finally achieved a standing position, he was pulling me toward the stairs. When we got to my room, he shut the door behind us and pressed me against it, kissing me so passionately, that my body felt as though it was on the biggest roller coaster in the world. Oh Dear Lord, please don’t let the ride end.

My world is still spinning. I can’t get out of this bed, because my legs are to weak to support my weight, and to tell you the truth, I don’t want to anyway. I can’t even tell him how I feel because I can’t speak. I can’t seem to catch my breath either. He must think that I’m crazy. I just keep looking at him. Trying to will him not to leave me, with just a look in my eye. I don’t even think he realizes what he’s done to me. This man could be the death of me. In fact, I think he was. I must have died and went to heaven, because he’s still here. I don’t hear any of my friends downstairs. That must mean I’m dead right? Oh well, what a way to go, huh?

Oh God! I’m not dead. I just felt him wrap his arms around me and whisper in my ear. “Don’t you think we should get back to the party?” To hell with this party. I can barely function right now. I just want to lay in this bed with this man forever. I want to forget that the rest of the world even exists. I want to feel the warmth of his body pressed against mine until the end of time. I want to hear all the words he whispers in my ear. But he’s leaving. He’s getting out of bed. No this isn’t how this is suppose to end. He’s suppose to stay. Come on Michael say something. Don’t just lay here like a jackass. Don’t let this man walk out of your life like everyone else. JUST FUCKING SPEAK!!!

“Don’t go.” Oh great. After the passion this man just showed you, all you could come up with was ‘don’t go’? But wait. He stopped. He’s walking back over here. He’s leaning down and giving me another tender kiss. Then he says the words I’ve been longing to hear from him. “Don’t worry darlin’. I’m just going to take a shower so we can get back downstairs before they send out a search party. But I have to warn you. I think it’s gonna take a team of wild horses to drag me out of this house tonight.” My world started spinning again. He’s staying. As far as I’m concerned I’ll shoot the first horse that I see near him.

This actually turned out to be a great birthday. Maybe 40 isn’t so bad after all. The party was great. Everyone got me some really cool stuff. They’ve all gone home now. Steve’s upstairs waiting on me, while I lock up the house. I take one look at the carnage that is laying around my house and start to get depressed again. Then I hear his voice, coming from upstairs. “Darlin’, you coming to bed?” I turn off the lights downstairs and head to my room to play with my favorite present. What can I say? Kevin always knows exactly what I want.